Our Oscars bingo game is better than the actual show

Why do so many people fail to take the Academy Awards seriously? Remember, this night is a tender, beautiful, sacred occasion in which you get to bear witness as the pretty people renew their love for themselves. Sure, it would be more exciting if, just once...

Our Oscars bingo game is better than the actual show

Why do so many people fail to take the Academy Awards seriously? Remember, this night is a tender, beautiful, sacred occasion in which you get to bear witness as the pretty people renew their love for themselves. Sure, it would be more exciting if, just once in a while, a starlet who didn’t win Best Actress slapped the winner and said, “That belongs to me, bee-yotch!” But some of the snoozy recurring elements (like the inevitable joke about how draggy things are getting) can actually be kind of charming, like reruns of your favorite sitcoms from childhood.

Still, certain aspects of the ceremony, such as the endless lists of thank-yous to people you’ve never heard of, can be a bore. So to help make the evening more interesting, play Oscar bingo.

To make an Oscar bingo card, use our list (at bottom of story) of 25 things likely to happen during the ceremony — from a starlet’s wardrobe malfunction to a minor winner’s acceptance speech getting cut short — to fill out a 5-by-5 grid (create your own or download our blank bingo cards below). Fill in the 25 squares in random order and have your party guests do the same so every card is unique. You can also download some that are already filled in.

You win by paying close attention: Put a coin on each square every time the event mentioned occurs, and when you have a complete row, be the first to yell, “Oscar bingo!” to everyone in the room. If you’re alone, you can cheat!

• Meryl Streep looks overly enthusiastic

• “La La Land” is spoofed

• Someone gives a shout-out to immigrants

• A minor winner is played off by orchestra

• An actress covers her mouth with both hands in shock

• Someone makes a Trump joke

• Someone refers to the length of the show

• Casey Affleck doesn’t laugh at a joke

• Denzel flashes 1,000-watt smile

• Someone jokes about “Manchester by the Sea” being “depressing”

• Lin-Manuel Miranda is called a genius

• A presenter garbles the name of a foreigner

• Jimmy Kimmel comes up with a hashtag

• A loser is unable to conceal disappointment

• Climate change mentioned

• Actress suffers a wardrobe malfunction

• Mention of George Clooney having twins

• An agent is thanked

• Foreign winner says something in foreign language

• Manly dude hoists statue over his head

• Comic gag involving sound to set up sound awards

• Winner credits “my mom,” forgets dad

• Overwhelmed person goes, “Wow!”

• Shot of Mel Gibson’s resting bitch face

• Obligatory “50 Shades” joke

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